The question of improvement vs. transformation was one we asked during the first Essentials conference call earlier this week. And it is a profound and extremely important question for any of us that are striving to practice Evolutionary Enlightenment to answer for ourselves. If you are familiar with Andrew Cohen’s teaching about “clarity of intention” you will recognize that the inquiry into improvement vs. transformation is another way to clarify what your spiritual intention actually is.
Before I go on to discuss this question I first want to say as I did on the call that when we are looking into our own motives all that matters is that we really discover what is motivating us – NOT that we find the “right” motive. That might sound strange, but after 18 years of work on this path I can tell you without hesitation that it is true. The only way to either change or strengthen your motivation is by being clear about what your motivation ACTUALLY is. If you think you want one thing when you actually want something else there is no way to develop. As Andrew Cohen has said for years, “You can only move from where you are.”
With that clarified let’s take a look at what we discussed in our first call. We were looking into why we are involved with Evolutionary Enlightenment as a practitioner in the first place. Many people want to improve their lives by improving different parts of their lives. They might want to go to a gym to get stronger or faster. They might want to take a course to learn more. They might go to a training to gain skills. Or do a spiritual practice to become “more spiritual.” All of those activities are fundamentally about improving the person that we already are. Those types of changes are added to who we are without necessarily changing who we are in any fundamental way. Have you ever known someone (maybe even yourself) who made significant changes to one aspect of their life and then been disappointed to find that those positive improvements didn’t seem to have any effect on other parts of them?
On our call we were engaging in fearless self reflection. Is this kind of self-improvement what is actually motivating our involvement with Evolutionary Enlightenment? I am not saying that having this motive is bad or wrong, simply that if this is what is motivating you it is important that you know it.
Most of us who begin to work with Evolutionary Enlightenment, or any other spiritual path, start by because we want spiritual self-improvement. We want to be a more spiritual person who lives a more spiritual life. I know that is what got me started. Ultimately, however, the teaching of Evolutionary Enlightenment offers and is really about the possibility of transformation. When we talk about transformation we are talking about a much more fundamental change than is implied by self-improvement. Have you ever known someone who transformed? What you recognize in a person who has transformed is that they have not just changed some part of themselves; they actually seem like a different person. It can be shocking to be confronted with someone who has transformed, who has changed so deeply that you feel like you are meeting them for the first time even if you knew them well before.
Remember that Evolutionary Enlightenment is at heart a teaching of Enlightenment; and Enlightenment means spiritual transformation. I believe that those who have become spiritually transformed have not only fundamentally changed from who they used to be to who they are; they have actually become a different kind of human being. Spiritually transformed human beings have long been recognized to see the world differently. Their actions are motivated by different values and driven by deeper sources of energy and wisdom than seems to drive most of us.
What is it that is motivating your involvement with Evolutionary Enlightenment? Do you want to improve aspects of who you are? Do you want to transform? Or do you want to become a spiritual transformed, Evolutionarily Enlightened human being? As we talked about together on our call, when we begin to approach these big questions we may experience fear in relationship to the possibility of transforming. That seems natural enough response because usually when we are confronted with the real potential of transformation we instinctively fear for what we “imagine” we “might” have to give up – our job, our house, our friends, our family – whatever it is. It is interesting to note that we assume that we will lose things, but it seldom occurs to us in these moments of reflexive kickback that things might get better. Maybe I won’t lose my job, but get better at it, or maybe I will lose my job because I won’t want it anymore and will find a much better one. Maybe my relationships with friends and family will actually become deep and profound, what makes us believe that that spiritual transformation and enlightenment will make things worse – it doesn’t really make sense. We might not be involved with Evolutionary Enlightenment to improve parts of ourselves, but that doesn’t mean that it makes sense to assume that things will necessarily get worse. The arising of fear may be natural enough, but that doesn’t mean we should listen to it. That is why on the call I asked all of us to think about what it is we fear more – the possibility we might change or the possibility that we might never change.
I would love to continue this discussion with all of you here on this blog so please add your thoughts as comments.
During the Being retreat, I realized there was no need to wait any longer for an experience that would convince me that my life needed to transform. I realized that I needed to take full responsibility for what I had already experienced and reflect in it in my life. Prior to that moment of clarity I was improving pieces of me according to the evolutionary teachings. But I wasn’t ready to transform. Since the retreat I can say that I am more afraid of not changing than of changing. Of course the fear of change is there but I am getting almost daily reminders of how much better life is with transformation.In the background there is YES! rather than maybe. I am so grateful to everyone who is a part of this.
I find it deeply freeing to no longer have a concept of a life without fear but to be aware of the liberating fact, that it only counts how one acts in the face of fear.
To focus on this part is where transformative qualities wake up immediately.
Yeah, I completely agree. For a long time, I thought the answer (my ego’s answer) was to just escape the feeling of fear but that just propels you into a life lived out of the fear of fear, as someone mentioned. That’s just ridiculous. It really is learning how to stand in that fear and face it, moving through and beyond it.
Hi Jeff,
I think this is such a fundamental question, for beginners and perhaps especially for those of us who have been on the spiritual path for many years. ie. Do I want to improve, or do I want total transformation? On one hand there is no harm in doing spiritual practices that lead to steady improvement and the purification of one’s self, but at a certain point I have to ask myself, has anything really changed? Am I deluding myself and lulling myself to sleep? Swami Chidananda was very fond of the sanskrit phrase: Uttishta Jagratah! Arise! Awake! He was always trying to wake us up to a much deeper dimension of ourselves. I know that I must choose the “total transformation” option in order to fulfill my destiny in this lifetime, and become an agent for positive change. Self improvement just isn’t going to swing it!
Dear Moo, I would certainly agree. At a certain point only transformation is really going to be enough.
My motivation of engaging with EE basically stems from wanting to be free from the fears and desires of my mind more than anything else. I have a tremendous fear of not changing. There is also a responsibility and an obligation that comes with the first tenet and wanting to change in order to live up to that change. And at this point this fear is much stronger than the fear of changing. My fear of changing mostly stems from going through the hassle of possibly having to sell my house (or whatever else) rather than actually selling it etc.
that has become another motivation for me to engage with you in this conversation.
Since the becoming retreat I actually have this aspiration of the potential for creating Heaven on Earth! I know it is possible. I have been there. It is a fantastic reference point that I now have
Forward .. Rabab
These days I am starting to see that I have seen transformation as better than improvement and they were both horizontal activities. Now I am starting to recognize that the transformation that is needed gets out of the way to become a perfect vessel for spirit. Now the fear of not changing is much greater than the fear for change.
I believe that the transformation that Andrew is talking about is acctually the transformation that allows real and deep developmpent to begin in earnest.
Not changing seems like death and suffocation, changing/transfroming seems like life and absolutely positive, so night and day and there is definitely a fear of not changing. It is the first tenet, then of course backing that up with whatever it takes to acheive ……!
What has blown me away is the recognition of a higher reason to transform. EE adds an amazing context, which is completely palpable. We are tranforming for the entire universe itself. It can’t get better then that.
As I study my motivations I hope I find that come up somewhere in there!
I realized during the call that my fear of not changing was greater than my fear of transformation. For me this course was very inspiring because it gave me the possibility to know where I was at . And it is the only possibility to move foward.
My experience has changed and now there is an emotional connection when I make choices for transformation rather than for improvement. Even if I continue to make choices like in sport or learning to improve some levels or qualities, behind that is a sense of transformation that emerges and is tangible.
Fear is an interesting thing in itself to contemplate. Fear is not necessarily a bad thing. Fear of fear (as Churchill said) is the thing to be feared, that is for sure. But a healthy engagement with fear can be productive. It keeps you awake and alert. The kind of fear I experience when contemplating transformation and change has an exhilarating edge to it that is compelling.
What is it we are afraid of when we contemplate change/transformation? It is a journey into the unknown – a place where there are no guarantees. As Jeff has suggested, we just seem to kneejerk assume that means ‘bad things’ will be revealed. But of course, ‘better things’ are also just as likely to be revealed – and if we are not being reckless, probably even more likely. And as anyone who contemplates life just a nanometer below the surface realises, guarantees and certainty are an illusion anyway. Canadian singer/songwriter Bruce Cockburn has a song ‘ The Trouble with Normal is it Always Gets Worse’! I feel a far worse kind of fear when I think of stasis.
Great point Daniel. What a tragedy to be slowly killed by the usual and typical that somehow hide in banality. Engaging with creative tension and having a healthy relationship to discomfort, including fear, is definitely one way to stay on our toes.
After many years of fervently pursuing conventional self-improvement, it has become radically clear to me no matter what I do to this end, I will still be heavily in my own way- the construct of the separate self and the mechanisms to protect and strengthen it impair me, even when I’m paying direct attention to the activities of my mind all day long, to such a degree that I’ll never be able to move in and affect this world the way I’ve always desired unless total transformation occurs.. It’s the only way. The ‘creature has to get out’ as Thomas Keating would say.
This is great Jeff! Thanks for the blog and course.
Wow. I can never be reminded too much of this distinction–change or improvement versus transformation. Landmark Education uses this distinction and brings attention to the way our use of language reflects our orientation, i.e. the language of change vs. the language of transformation. Do I want to have MORE freedom, or do I want to be FREE. I find it very interesting to see the way intention is reflected in subtle linguistic distinctions in both interpersonal communication and the way I talk to myself and make meaning out of things.
To seriously consider transformation does create a fork in the fear road as Jeff pointed us to. There have been a lot of forest fires around the Boulder area where I live, so I’m finding the fire of transformation metaphor particularly accessible. To the part of us that wants to play it safe and small, transformation is like a fire approaching our house–all of a sudden there’s something to lose and there’s risk involved. The view from this perspective sees all the things in the house, our pasts and our desired futures that could be lost and, as Jeff pointed mentioned, assumes they will be. To the part of us that is always already seeking that which is higher and not yet, radical transformation is like the fire burning away the older canopy that has been suppressing the emerging saplings from below. From this perspective there is no house to lose, only new growth whose liberation is born from the ashes of the old. From this place of always reaching, the possibility of the fire never coming really is the worst thing that could ever happen. In both cases a kind of fear of losing everything is elicited, but from diametric positions: one that looks at what already is, and the other that looks at what could be.
When I look as deeply as I can into the egoic fear of transformation, the very concept of “never transforming” is nowhere to be found in it’s vernacular and fear from such a thing certainly doesn’t warrant emotional response. The personal ego translates this concept to the idea of never getting more stuff, more ideas, more gratification, more understanding, more peace, more love, which it would agree is bad. It’s on board for more, for change, for improving.
This means that we’d have to be animated and motivated by something other than our egos in order to seriously consider the possibility and consequences of never transforming. Facing the costs and consequences of maintaining the status quo is something the ego will undauntingly endeavor to distort. Honestly and objectively looking at my life, I can see how much relating to the fear of transformation is the default setting, like a cavity worn into a chair from sitting in the same place for too long. It doesn’t mean that I can’t break the inertia, it just means that it takes effort. Transformation is certainly an anti-gravity pursuit and the first tenet is definitely rocket powered fuel.
There is no doubt that I want to transform. But how much am I willing to let go , trust and fully engage in this evolutionary process? Its interesting that my first thoughts would be negative-what if I REALLY try hard and don’t change or transform? I know I tried a lot of self-improvement in psychospiritual circles in the past and it helped a little, but not at a fundamental level. I have though, right now, I have this funny feeling that its really possible to transform with this group-enlightennext-and its really exciting, thrilling, and yet terrifying at the same time! Funny- be careful what you wish for, you might just get it! : )
As I contemplated this question on the call (and since then), it occurred to me that if I simply choose to live aligned with my highest understanding in every moment, this alone would literally transform everything about (my) life. From this perspective, there is no fear about change. Rather, it simply seems natural and logical and obvious.
That is fantastic Kristie!
Another thing I have been contemplating was contrasting what transformation looks like on the Exteriors of our lives and on the Interiors of our lives. One can change jobs, sell the house, relocate, end a marriage, get rid of stuff, etc etc – and not transform on the inside at all — and on the other hand, the Exterior of one’s life can appear relatively unchanged while on the Interior, one transforms completely. It is interesting to contemplate complete transformation (or as Kristie says, ‘living aligned with your highest understandings’) without changing much in the Exterior domains of your life (or at lease really critically asking yourself – what aspects of your Exterior life are really truly blocks to interior transformation that need to be let go?).
Daniel and Kristie… I totally agree with your points. When I think about how much I have tried to change my Interior by changing my Exterior (jobs, relationships, moving to new cities)… this dialogue makes me think of the phrase “Where ever you go, there you are.” Nothing is really going to shift at a fundamental level until real Interior transformation takes place!
Yes I relate to this , Daniel :
Somehow what seems important is to be able to see our Internal changes from an External [ or objective] point of view and not the reverse. The reverse would be to see External changes that we make from an Internal [ or subjective] view point. The reverse is basically what I have been trained to do form my culture, and it is probably a universal training that we all had.
We have to make a kind of conversion
OK about the question of fear to transform vs fear not to change at all, I must sheepishly admit that I am absolutely terrified to transform. My fear to transform is
10000000000 times stronger than the fear not to transform.
It sometimes amounts to shear terror [ what will I do if this happens; how will I function in the world; how will I be able to continue my work etc...]
Thanks for being honest, Catherine. I think a lot of us feel exactly the same way at different times. Maybe we need to face that reality more and more deeply rather than running from it, so that we might refine our motivations.
I remember being told that our ego’s fear doesn’t have to disappear in order to move forward, only that our spiritual curiosity has to become greater. Maybe it doesn’t have to be entirely motivated by the fear of a lack of change but by the curiosity of what amazingly positive things just might be possible:)
Only now I can see the big difference between improving a part of myself (what I tried to do all my life!) and transforming my whole life. It is quite challenging to go so far, and I think it is only possible if I know how to deal with fear. If I realize that experiencing fear is an impersonal fact, I can look at it from a higher perspective. This is profoundly liberating and allows me to open to the cauntless possibilities that are inherent in the evolutionary proces itself, for the sake of the process. That is worth living!
Thank you, Jeff
Only now I can see the big difference between improving a part of myself (what I tried to do all my life) and transforming my whole life. It is really challenging to go so far. And I think it is only possible if I know how to deal with fear. If I realize that experiencing fear is an impersonal fact, I can look at it from a higher perspective. This is profoundly liberating and allows me to open to the cauntless possibilities that are inherent in the evolutionary process; for the sake of the process itself. That is worth living!
Thank you, Jeff
Hi everyone! Do you know where I can find the link to the recording of the first call?
Thank you,
Magali
What I’ve started to realize about not changing is that I don’t want to give up certain things I do. Is this fear or egoic greed, I’m unsure. What I am finding is that transformation does require saying ‘no’ to what doesn’t alighn with the highest ideaLs. This saying NO seems to e the hardest part so far. What ego wants to be told No? Not mine
Choosing transformation more than improvement is a “big YES” to a deep new way of life, a big YES to dive in the unknown and to let everything go, a big YES to the creative process ! And it’s so exciting !! What I deeply recognized during the last retreat is that it is incredibly liberating to embrace this position… I’m still touched by this “revelation”, and it’s very helpul to face my ego in my daily life …. I mean it’s a big shift to choose transformation more than improvement. The last call and all the comments here are very helpful to go forward on this way. So thank you Jeff, thank you everyone !!
I guess that the fear that transforming might mean that things will get worse is a common one. When I examine my native language I find a lot of proverbs and sayings that points to this fear, which also has made a deep imprint on me. Improvement is a much less threatening concept since it is just points to an enhancement of what you’ve allready accepted as desirable. What helps a lot of people to aspire to go through a transformation anyway, is often the example of role-models who allready made the journey and who functions as living exemplars of the convincing wisdom, strength and grace that comes with a profound spiritual transformation.
I am terrified by the possibility of NOT transforming. There are very real external limitations which I face because of my physical disability and as I get older some of these get even more difficult. I begin to develop a kind a hopelessness that has me freeze up and die (in a figurative way, of course). What has always pushed me forward is my insatiable curiosity. I am always worried that I will miss something exciting or wonderful.
The ideas and possibilities generated from EnlightenNext are far beyond anything that I have ever thought might be possible. I have always been a seeker but it has been difficult to acknowledge and generate the depth of the internal work that is necessary. I am struggling to figure out how much of what feels like being stuck is the result of real limitations. And, how much is caused by an egoic avoidance of knowing that I may only be limited by my stubborn attachment to being a victim.
From conversations with many other people over much time I have come to see how many of us truly believe our limitations are “real”. I have also had some “brief” moments of transformation when there were no limitations, no where, and no how. I was sure I could fly.
I have always known that my purpose in this world and this life is transformation. Now it is time to get very serious about the internal work that is necessary so that I can “really” have an impact. I am looking forward to having this discussion to push me forward.
Thank you Jeff for the work you do and are doing to generate so much possibility.
These are interesting and insightfull things to ponder. Upon reading this blog I felt compelled to think back to the moment when I decided that I wanted to be free more than anything else. Then I put myself in that moment and examined what my motivation was at that time. I found this to be a helpful exercise. I also felt it to be reaffirming, and as Jeff eluded to in the blog, it does seem to help clarify one’s intention. I’m finding that within the context of this exercise, this self-examination of motive, there is no space for fear. Moving beyond this exercise with some increased sense of clarity and conviction, using my choosing capacity and facing what I must, there is perhaps only the fear of not changing, of not evolving. It feels more like motivation than fear. Of course, I’m sure that when change seems iminent, there may be fear of that too! I think that the important thing is to hold my intention and the position of freedom–tightly.
Thank you for facilitating this course and blog Jeff. This topic raised an awareness in me of how much ambivalence I have regarding this question of improvement versus transformation and how I vacillate between the two, very different, perspectives and how often I am willing to settle for “just improvement” – comfortable for the ego and looks like I am still doing something! When I look deeply though, I see a real willingness and urgency to transform in the most radical way. I am re-inspired!
Jeff: “Spiritually transformed human beings have long been recognized to see the world differently. Their actions are motivated by different values and driven by deeper sources of energy and wisdom than seems to drive most of us.”
This statement reminds me of how Andrew Cohen speaks about living life in the context of non-duality, in the deepest recognition of our real human purpose in this life, and that it’s all One and not two. This is what I think of as “real transformation.” Improvement is still a dualistic position – there is still some identification with ego, still some pieces to let go. “Transformation” is an absolute “position” and “improvement” is a relative “process.”
I am so grateful for the teachings of Evolutionary Enlightenment because they provide the orientation to see fear as an impersonal impulse (as Sylviadora mentioned previously). This recognition allows objectivity and space to see the choice.
From the first call to reading this blog, the recognition of the fear of NOT changing is evolving into a fearlessness of transformation. I want to be a “spiritually transformed human being (that)… sees the world differently…motivated by different values and driven by deeper sources of energy and wisdom than seems to drive most of us.” Everything to gain and nothing to lose!
Jeff – thank you for this incredible course!
Love, Amy
Initially, my motivation for involvement with Evolutionary Enlightenment was that I wanted to hear what this education offers and grow more spiritually (All about “A little me”), and I didn’t know what to expect. Three days after this course, I went to Sausalito to attend Andrew’s seminar. That was the first time that I met him. Then, I listened to your teaching to this course again. I felt a shift- I feel I am not the same person I was before!
My intention is to become a spiritual transformed, Evolutionarily Enlightened human being so that my being-ness and becoming-ness have an effect in the culture, collective, and universe. I feel I am seeing the world from a new perspective, where I am taking on the responsibility for evolution of collective and my own.
The fear rises- the fear of un-known, lack of safety, lack of security, loosing peace, and etc. I am ready to let go because I am committed to be a spiritual transformed, Evolutionary Enlightened human being, and so be it.
Thank you so much Jeff,
Mina
All your comments have been so helpful. Thank you. Jeff’s invitation to look at our own motives is at the crux of the issue for me. When I am truly honest with myself, I know that fear of the unknown or that things might get worse motivate many of my actions. That said, I am here, I take responsibility for where I am in my life, so that I can pursue change to transform my life. It is neither good or bad, nor here or there, it just is. Although at present, I see no answers, knowing what has been motivating me, does provide a sense of freedom so that I can move along this path to transformation. My belief has been that it would happen in one ground-breaking moment, which may happen, but more importantly, it also happens a step at a time with clarity of intention and freedom of choice.